Corporation at the market

For it is in giving that we receive  Francis of Assisi

For the longest time, I looked at giving to communities as a corporate venture or at least one done on the Non Governmental Organization (NGO) level.  I saw philanthropy as a big word practised by big business; as a way to circumvent the negative effects of their presence (read oil business), or as a way to feel good about all the billions they make each year, whilst there are people in their immediate surrounds going without food, shelter or even basic healthcare.  I recently heard a story that helped reshape my thinking.

This is the story of a young girl and her slightly older sister (18 if she was a day) who ventured from our capital city to our second largest city in search of gainful employment. These young girls had spent a stint in Nairobi unsuccessfully, in the hands of so-called relatives who had brought them from up-country on the pretence of “helping” their poor relatives. The experience was a disaster for the young girls as they discovered quickly that they had been brought to be slaves by their “relative”.  Eventually she kicked them out in the middle of the night and it took a kind neighbour to both house them for the night and give them enough bus fare for them to travel to Mombasa.

Silly, brave girls had no real plan, they just believed that when they arrived, they would find work and begin their lives.  They also knew that they could not go back home to the hardship and poverty they had left behind, continuing to be a burden on their parents who had 14 other mouths to feed.  The ride to Mombasa was uneventful and the girls found themselves in Mwembe Tayari with nowhere to go and no one who knew them or cared. They arrived at night, frightened by the dark and unfamiliar with their surroundings, they harboured by the side of a building and spent the night, with the night watchmen as their only involuntary security.  Night passed into dawn and in the morning the hustle and bustle of the day began.

Two young girls, terrified yet brave, huddled in the corner like two abandoned kittens, vulnerable to the world, yet not crippled by it into inaction.  This is how she found them, wary yet curious.  She could see their terror just layers from the brave faces they put on.  Watching them, memories of times past flooded her mind and allowed her to make a decision. She knew well the look of abandonment, the sour taste of wretchedness, tossed out with yesterday’s garbage to face the elements. She saw it all in these two girls huddled together on the side of the building. These children needed rescuing and she was going to be their saviour.

She took them home, not much yet a safe haven for her and her foundlings, nursed their insecurities, fed their undernourished bodies and allowed them to have the space and mindset to organize their heads and look for work. Each day they ventured out to work (they eventually got gainful employment) and she went to the market to find her fortune, she worried about them, unable to eat her evening meal until “her girls” came home safely.

They lived with her, laughed with her, grew with her and became whole with her, for seven long wonderful months. They gave her a sense of family, something she had not experienced in a long time.  She gave them love and security, something they had not really experienced before with 14 other siblings around and being in the hands of abusive relatives.  She knew that they had grown and were ready to take on the world on their own terms.  In month eight when her son from a forgotten past came to get her, she was ready to leave, happy to reconcile with her son. He came to give her a back a portion of what she had given him, rescue her; he came to take her home.  It was a happy reunion and her departure from her “girls”, a bitter-sweet parting of strangers who had become family.

As mentioned earlier, my thought of giving has been somewhat restricted by the idea that corporations and organizations and other big groups are the ones that give, really give and have the greatest impact.  Yet per our culture, our own traditions are steeped with people reaching out and helping each other (it takes a village…..).   This true story is my emancipation from that thought onto a more enlightened place. Hearing it convinced me that it is possible for each and every one of us to make a difference in the lives of those around us (our village).  We just have to have faith that doing good for others, is not limited to just organizations and corporations, we can be corporations within ourselves.

Rising Blossom

“Be not afraid of growing slowly; be afraid only of standing still” Chinese Proverb

Speaking to my almost teen daughter the other night, we were talking about blogging, she has finally decided that my blog, might be good enough for her to invest a few minutes reading what I have written; that is the articles that her and I have not co-authored. Continue reading

Boyfriends, memories and the tapestry of life!

We don’t accomplish anything in this life alone…and whatever happens is the result of the whole tapestry of one’s life and all the weavings of individual threads from one to another that creates something.       -Sandra Day O’Connor

A while ago, I happened upon an old boyfriend, actually my very first boy friend, talk about a blast from the past! Anyway in conversing with him, he reminded me of a ritual we used to have whilst we dated back in the day, and it was way way back trust me! Continue reading

“Don’t worry be happy” *

“No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change”.  Barbara De Angelis

What is happiness? “Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy.” This is according to Wikipedia.

How many times in life does someone ask you “are you happy?”  Who or what defines your happiness?  Taking a glimpse within, I must admit there was a time in my life when I thought and believed that my partner defined my happiness, he was responsible for ensuring that I was content and experienced that intense joy, after all he loved me right? So he should ensure that the person he loves was happy!

 Back in those dark ages, when I had little enlightenment about this thing happiness and knew less about myself, one of the ways I wanted my partner to signify without a doubt that he loved me was by buying me flowers. I felt that if he loved me and knew how much I liked flowers, then he would surely want to make me happy and buy me flowers.  I waited and waited and waited, for flowers that were not forthcoming, he bought me other things and in his own way showed me he cared, but he did not buy me flowers and I was not complete, I still needed this symbol of his love and I really did like flowers so much, still do.

Many years later I would go out, see a lovely bouquet of flowers and dare to buy them myself.  I would bring them home or to the office, put them in a vase with water and I would love them, they would make me happy! They would give me that intense joy! What a surprise! So it is the flowers that made me happy, who bought them was not important! What an epiphany for me! What power I had returned to myself! This being one example of many, I learned quickly that ultimately, I was responsible for my happiness.  I decided whether I was happy or not, people or things around me could not make that decision for me, unless I gave them the power.

Now I know that though surrounding myself with positive people and attracting positive energy lends in my happiness, yet those around me can only take away my happiness if I let them.  They may try to create misery, and unfortunately in life, many succeed.  However, I have the power to decide how I will allow people to affect me.  I decide who I surround myself with and if they do not make me feel good inside my soul and they don’t add value to my life, then I have to be strong enough to make the decision to sever ties, even though at times it means remaining alone.

Many things make me happy, life, the laughter of a child, the dawning of the day with the warming rays of the sun, the pitter patter of raindrops against my window pane, the light breeze over the ocean as the sun sets and the day draws to a close.  The sound of music (no pun intended, I do like the movie as well), the smell of pastries right out of the oven, the sight of my angel, sleeping, smiling, being pensive or concentrating, my angel period, a great source of happiness for me.  A rainbow in the distance, I still love cut flowers (hint, hint J), a good book, my friends:, their love, support and all the moments we LOL* together! I could go on forever, and for that I am grateful. I have so much that makes me happy,  and thank God that I am enlightened enough and know myself well enough to be able to recognize happiness and differentiate it with that  which has the opposite effect.

The world is full of sadness and misery, every time we look around we see something that just depresses us and makes us feel bad.  But the world also has so much good, beauty and joy. We need it all, it is imperative that we find individual ways to be happy. I believe that happiness will give us hope and make everything else palatable.  If we live with anger, sorrow and despair, then we do not live.   We crush our hopes and diminish our souls, our possibilities to be greater, better, wiser people.  On the contrary,  if we can make the choice to be happy, look for and find that happiness around us, then we can continue to feed our souls with hope and inspiration and be able to take the next positive step into our future!  You have the power make the change, use it, make the decision to be happy!

*Bobby McFerrin 1988