Putting in the woman hours!

“To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, You have to be in their lives today.”
― Barbara Johnson

Wow, thirteen years ago today she came into the world, my angel.   I never really knew then how profoundly she would change my life, my world and all my perspectives of every value and belief that I had.  Now I try to hold on to every single moment that I can, I feel that she is slipping through my fingers each and every day, more rapidly than the day before.  She said to me at breakfast today “mummy, you have been in my life since I was born” and I have, from birth to 13 and beyond.  I am in awe of this wondrous creature that I call my Angel, how she has grown and changed and the spectrum of emotions she can invoke in me. Am not sure there is another person alive who can take me from delight to despair and back to delight again with the span of seconds. Continue reading

Rising Blossom

“Be not afraid of growing slowly; be afraid only of standing still” Chinese Proverb

Speaking to my almost teen daughter the other night, we were talking about blogging, she has finally decided that my blog, might be good enough for her to invest a few minutes reading what I have written; that is the articles that her and I have not co-authored. Continue reading

Let me tell you a secret!

In the relationships between parents and children trust is a very important issue.  From birth children look to their parents for guidance. For a blissful few years we the parents are the ultimate in our children’s eyes?   They look to us to help them maneuver through life!  Parents, doesn’t it feel wonderful when your child looks at you with eyes full of trust; sure that we know all there is to know in the world? Continue reading

A single step

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Lao-tzu, The Way of Lao-tzu  Chinese philosopher (604 BC – 531 BC) 

Not very long ago, my daughter started going through puberty! I was in shock, I was not ready for this, after all they say that the timing of puberty is typically followed from the mother of the child and I did not actually hit puberty until I was almost 15. Late maybe, but that was that, so in my mind I had at least   a few more  years to prepare for this thing, this life changing thing that would propel my little girl into womanhood (okay, young womanhood but womanhood all the same). Continue reading

Tween-tro

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A few years back a good friend gave me a book, “The Mother Daughter book club: How Ten Busy Mothers and Daughters Came Together to Talk, Laugh and Learn through Their Love of Reading,  by Shireen Dodson: May 7, 1997.  I started reading this book and decided to take on the challenge, realizing that a few of us, all coincidentally mothers of little girls were rapidly losing touch with our daughters as they grew every day.  The mother daughter relationship can be both turbulent and hectic; it is also in my opinion one of the most beautiful relationships available on this earth. 

So thanks to this book and my desire, to not have a typically contentious relationship with my daughter, and being African therefore  advocating fully “it takes a village to raise a child” I embarked on creating my “village” a collection of mothers with daughters of a similar age, pre-tweens (age group 9-13).

  • The idea was to learn about our children, how they feel about matters, in a fun, non-confrontational way
  • A chance for us to spend time together,
  • whilst helping our daughters begin forming their own “village” where they have a network of girl friends that they can share and experience with, and refer to for assistance and guidance,
  • To give the mothers an opportunity to bond for the well being of our daughters, and in the process bond as friends and share in each other’s experiences of raising little girls.

Inspired by the book “The mother daughter book club” and our own sad attempt at establishing an actual  mother/daughter book club, which by the way was not successful, getting a collection of mothers and daughters together in the same place at the same time, proved difficult.  However “no retreat, no surrender” so we may not be able to meet physically, maybe virtually we will have more success?

I will state at this juncture that fathers with daughters are welcome to partake in this process.  I will apologize here that we did not take into consideration little boys and their mothers or their fathers, it was not a malicious exclusion; just that as a mother of a little girl this is where my strength lies.   I hope that following our example other mothers with sons or fathers with sons may also be able to set up their own “villages” for themselves and their little boys.